Healing Journey: Depression to Joy

Around this time last year, I found myself at the lowest point in my life. My heart was broken, and depression consumed me, causing me to spiral out of control. Every day felt like a battle just to keep my head above water as I struggled to crawl out of the pit of despair. I spent months confined to my bed, lacking the energy or desire to do even the simplest tasks like showering or cleaning my house. But as time passed, I began to slowly pick myself up from the darkness.

Usagi Tsukino, Sailor Moon (1992)

Like a phoenix rising from its ashes, my journey of healing commenced with a life-changing event: receiving an acceptance letter from Concordia University. I was ecstatic to be admitted into my first-choice program, English Literature, even though I missed the deadline for the Fall Semester, and my studies would begin in the Winter. This opportunity motivated me to reignite my passions for reading and blogging, which brought genuine happiness into my life once again.

When school started, everything seemed to take a positive turn. I relished every class I attended, diving enthusiastically into the syllabus and enthusiastically sharing my love for the fascinating texts I was reading. I honed my skills in writing critical, academic essays with strong arguments. Being a student with limited disposable income forced me to budget carefully, but it also meant investing wisely in my passions, like collecting anime figures, and, most importantly, in my education.

Weekends were no longer about extravagant outings but became cozy, fulfilling times spent at home, enjoying horror movies or my favourite music while working on school projects. This slower, more deliberate pace of life brought me more contentment than the reckless spending I used to engage in. I became discerning about some of the people I kept in my surroundings and began seeking supportive and like-minded individuals who aligned with my aspirations and brought positivity into my life.

Amid this transformative period, I unexpectedly met the love of my life, and our connection was immediate and profound. He embodies everything I ever dreamed of in a partner and more. In a way, it felt like destiny had brought us together. He not only supports my studies and goals but cherishes all aspects of my personality, including my inner strength, independence, and mental health challenges. I, in turn, reciprocate his affection wholeheartedly.

Another love of my life, my beloved child, has also been flourishing. It warms my heart to see her looking up to me as a role model. She's constantly encouraging me to bake treats, praising my baking skills and urging me to open my own bake shop. The pride she showed in wearing a university t-shirt with my school's name on it was heartwarming. Our bond as mother and daughter has strengthened even further, making our relationship truly special.

To add to the excitement, one of my articles was accepted for publishing in a book. While I've been previously published in blogs, this accomplishment feels more prestigious and validating, as if my work is finally being recognized on a higher level.

Usagi Tsukino, Sailor Moon (1992)

Though there have been a few bumps along the way, the positive aspects of my life far outweigh the negative now. The Universe seems to be sending me signs that I'm on the right path. Enthusiasm bubbles within me as I wonder where I'll be this time next year. Perhaps engaged and planning a wedding with my partner, or living together in a house filled with love and joy. As a writer, will I continue achieving my professional goals, and will my academic pursuits be met? The anticipation of what the future holds fills me with excitement and hope, knowing that I've overcome my darkest days and emerged stronger, happier, and more fulfilled than ever before.

Usagi Tsukino, Sailor Moon

***This blog post owes its existence to the incredibly inspiring article penned by The Very Curious Doctor Z  her thought-provoking piece, she eloquently explores the nuanced contrast between finding Joy and simply being happy. Driven by a relentless curiosity and a profound understanding of human emotions, Doctor Z delves into the depths of these two seemingly similar but distinct experiences.***

Source:  Zawadzki, Mary F. “The Joy Thief.” The Very Curious Doctor Z, 16 July 2023, theverycuriousdocz.com. Accessed 19 July 2023.