The Diary Of An Insane Bat Mom

I posted the other day about feeling like I was hit in the face with a pie. As a side, I am being nerdy here, check out my title, hehe! If you get it, comment!  Anyways, I was angry and I posted a big eff you to the Universe or God or whatever because I just had enough with this bad luck streak.  I vented to a really good friend of mine and she mentioned something about Mercury being in retrograde. Apparently, it will be ending soon and I am glad for the dust to settle so to speak. I am starting to see some truth behind her words about the whole retrograde thing: You know when you get angry and when you are done raging, you have this moment of serene calm, then the depression hits because you realized that deep down, you weren't really angry but really frigging sad? I had an epiphany where I realized that a lot of my anger towards things was really my inability to fully grasp a concept. I am actually pretty annoyed at myself.  Seriously, the pies just keep on coming! I realized I w

If you watched the TV series, "Invader Zim" by Jhonen Vasquez, you would know that the character, Zim laughs maniacally whenever shit hits the fan or he is up to no good.  I feel like Zim right now. It feels like the world around me is one colossal dumpster fire and I am up in my spaceship or little house with garden gnomes, sitting at my desktop, just laughing maniacally.  For context, here is a humourous gif of Zim's maniacal laugh. If you can hear images, this would be the one! Have fun, enjoy! I guess it is no surprise to you, dear readers, that I have ultimately and utterly lost my shit. You see, over a year ago, I didn't follow my gut when it came to this certain individual. Turns out, I was lucky and noticed before anything major can happen but I like to think that I had a horseshoe up my butt, two guardian angels at my side, and four leaf clovers shoved up my nose. In simpler terms, I narrowly avoided a nuclear explosion!  I decided then and there to be the go

"Sometimes being a bitch is all a woman's got to hold on to" - Stephen King, Dolores Claiborne I wrote a blog post yesterday titled "If He Wanted To, He Would " and that was a small part of me taking my power back. It was me shouting from the rooftops at the universe that I will no longer take any of that crap and if I should encounter this behaviour again, I am walking away. I will no longer entertain it. I cannot control how the other person reacts but I can sure control what I allow in my life I started taking my power back a couple of months ago when I honestly asked myself what I wanted out of my life. I enrolled in University and even got accepted into my first choice program. This was the start of something magical! I also got hurt by someone that I deeply cared about. This person pushed me away from the beginning and I tolerated it because I didn't know exactly what I wanted in a relationship at that time. Did I want something stable? Did I want the

 Lately, my new motto is "if he wanted to, he would" and I think it is a positive way to go about things. I am in my early forties and re-entered the dating field a few years ago after my divorce. It is very sad that things haven't changed much since my early twenties when I met my ex-husband. Someone once told me I shouldn't put men in the same basket because one guy treated me like shit. So far, I have noticed, that for every 5 guys I meet, maybe one of them is a decent guy. I hate to write a post like this because it is coming from a place of anger and bitterness but I have to go about personal experience. Anyways, I thought this post will be a reminder to me when I think I met the "Gomez to my Morticia" or "My Tuxedo Mask" because lately, I have been getting all crappy, cheap, imitation bootlegs! The thing is, I am the one to blame. I am not perfect but I like to think I am a great chick! I just need to be a little smarter when it comes to my c

“It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to.”  - J.R.R. Tolkien, The Lord Of The Rings Hello dear readers, First and foremost, I want to thank you for reading this blog! This was just a little project I did for me to work on my creative writing. It has helped me get back into that mindset and I am quite happy that I have started writing again.  Today, I feel like using this little blog as a journal and just writing about what is going on in my life and spilling some tea! So sit back, get your beverage, maybe even some popcorn and enjoy!  I figured I would write something a little easy today because I feel like writing but I have no inspiration to write a poem or a story so I thought I would give a life update because those are fun! I also have Covid and it is hard to get all creative when your mind is fuzzy so I thought I would write about what has been go

  Since You Have Been Gone - By Sylvie Dubois Since you have been gone I married the boy you told me about I remember you said: “Be careful of the things you say You may just marry him one day” And you were right but one thing was missing You weren’t there to give me away In exchange, I put your ring on my bouquet  and I felt your presence there that day Since you have been gone I got pregnant with your grandbaby But unfortunately, she just couldn’t stay Just like with you it felt like my whole world collapsed Yet somehow I knew you were there To hold me tight And tell me that everything will be alright Since you have been gone Much to our joy, I was with child again and when we found out it was a boy I knew he would take your name My pregnancy was harrowing but we pulled through And I like to believe it was because of you Since you have been gone You would be proud of your grandson He is an amazing kid who unfortunately will never know The greatest man who ever lived How I wish you co

Angel or Demon by Sylvie Dubois “ Demons to some, angels to others” - Hellraiser (1987) The machines hummed and beeped and they kept Amy awake at night. She knew in her many years of life these machines were being used to keep her alive. The thing is, with the long life she has lived, she wondered if there was any point. She had no relatives or grandchildren to look after her. She was laying in this hospital bed with the occasional company of volunteer staff and medical professionals who are only around to check her vitals. For the last few years, after her retirement, she pretty much lived as a recluse. There was one person that kept in touch with Amy and as far as she looked back in her mind, this person was always there since childhood. She will never forget that fateful night when she was merely six years old. It was the night she met Arden. It was also the same night her parents were brutally murdered and she somehow managed to sleep through it all. It was the closing of the back

    Unrequited Love by Sylvie Dubois I wish I had a chance to say All the feelings I have put away I am afraid, so very afraid That you will leave one day My heart, sealed away Never to let anyone in Because no one is meant to stay Last night, I made a wish That my heart will be open and true Like how it was in my youth The carefree way it used to I want to love again Without worries or care Although my heart was battered and bruised, I want to love a new To fully let someone in I wanted it to be him I wanted it to be you

  I think most parents will always remember the day their child was born. The joy and happiness the birth of a baby brings, especially the moment you first hold that child in your arms. For me, I felt all these things too but there was so much sadness, stress, and danger that the end result only made all that trouble worth it.  You see, by the end of my pregnancy, I was considered high risk. I was put on bed rest and things could have gone horribly wrong for the both of us. To this day, I still remember the fear and sadness I felt when the doctor told me that I was most probably going to have a C-section and I was to be on bed rest for the remainder of my pregnancy. I worried that I was going to lose my son. I felt like I was a loser mom because I probably wouldn't be able to carry a baby to term. All these sad thoughts kept me up at night and in the end, I had good reason to. I remember the days I spent on bed rest. I spent them in the nursery we had set up for the baby. By then,